My Nesting Partner and My Weekly Date
TikTok video from 2022-02-11
In my poly intro, I mentioned that I have six partners—and I realized it might be fun (and helpful!) to share more about who they are and how each relationship fits into my life. One of the things I love most about polyamory is the freedom it gives me to connect with people in different, unique, and meaningful ways. Every relationship looks a little different, and that’s what makes it beautiful.
Let’s start with my husband. He’s my nesting partner—we’ve been together for 35 years and married for 34. That’s a lot of time, and somehow, we still genuinely love each other’s company. He’s the person I share a home with, build a life with, and rely on in that deep, steady way that only comes with years of history and hard-earned understanding. We’re amazing companions, affectionate housemates, and truly the best of friends. He’s my day-in, day-out partner—the one who knows how I like my coffee, who’s seen me at my worst and still thinks I’m wonderful, and who I want by my side for the rest of my life.
Then there’s Sapio, my boyfriend. Sapio and I have been dating for about seven months, and our relationship has a totally different rhythm. It’s romantic and affectionate, and while we don’t live together, we make it a point to stay together once a week. He lives about an hour and a half away, so our time together is intentional—we plan fun outings, go to events, and share social experiences that light us both up. Our connection is newer, but it’s meaningful and full of curiosity and care. He’s also the partner I see the most frequently right now, and that regular presence adds a kind of sweetness and excitement to my week.
What’s fascinating is how these two relationships—so different in tone and structure—can coexist harmoniously in my life. My husband gives me a foundation of long-term stability and deep emotional trust. Sapio brings newness, energy, and shared adventures. I don’t need either relationship to be something it’s not. I don’t expect my nesting partner to be my social butterfly, or my boyfriend to offer the comfort of decades of shared memories. I get to appreciate each relationship for exactly what it is.
That’s the magic of polyamory. It gives me room to love fully and freely, to let relationships take the shape that fits best for everyone involved, and to celebrate connection in all its forms. It’s not about juggling or comparing—it’s about expanding. And the more I do, the more I learn just how rich and nuanced love can be.
So yes, I have six partners—but even just between these two, there’s a world of depth and delight. I’m grateful every day for the life I’ve created, and for the people who fill it with meaning.
Do you have relationships that show up in different ways in your life? I’d love to hear how love looks for you.
