Do My Husband and I Still Have Intimacy?
TikTok video from 2022-03-09
Hey, babe. I love this question, because it speaks to something a lot of people misunderstand about relationships—especially in the context of polyamory.
So here’s the honest answer: yes, my husband and I still have intimacy. But it’s evolved, and it may not look exactly how you’d expect.
Intimacy, for me, isn’t a one-size-fits-all thing. It doesn’t begin and end with sex. In fact, I experience different types of intimacy with all of my partners. Some of those relationships include intercourse, and others don’t. I’ve been open about that, even if I’m not specific about who falls into which category—because that’s not the point.
The point is: intimacy comes in many forms.
Think about it—don’t you have moments of deep connection or vulnerability with people in your life who aren’t your romantic partner? Maybe a friend you can tell anything to, or someone who sees the rawest version of you. That’s intimacy.
For me, intimacy can look like:
Sharing fears or dreams over coffee
Laughing together in a moment of total silliness
Holding hands during a quiet walk
Feeling seen and supported during a tough day
Being polyamorous has expanded my definition of intimacy. It’s taught me to appreciate the many ways I can connect with someone. And yes, that includes my husband.
We may not express intimacy in the same way we did when we were 25, but we’ve built something stronger: emotional trust, mutual understanding, deep friendship, and the kind of love that evolves rather than fades.
So yes—we still have intimacy. It just looks more layered now. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
