A Day in the Life of Polyamory (Yes, It Really Works)
TikTok video from 2022-06-26
I get it—this might sound like a logistical nightmare or the start of a bad sitcom. But this was just our Saturday. And I’m here to tell you, it worked beautifully.
Yesterday, my husband Everett—who I’ve been married to for 35 years—woke up, got dressed, and went to help someone move. Not just anyone, though. He was helping an ex-lover of mine—someone who, over time, has also become his friend. That kind of maturity, care, and lack of ego is rare, and it’s one of the reasons I love him more now than ever.
While he was doing that, he later met up with Lambo (yes, another one of my partners) to work on a side project they started together—making and selling custom cutting boards. These two men—connected through me—have chosen not just to tolerate one another but to collaborate, to build something with shared intention.
Meanwhile, I was with Sapio, running errands and doing some meal prep. We connect through deep conversation and everyday partnership. Our time together isn't always fireworks—it’s calm, steady, and nurturing. It balances me.
Later in the afternoon, Everett took a well-earned nap, and Lambo, Sapio, and I ended up watching a Netflix special together on the couch. It felt...normal. Comfortable. Like family. There was laughter, inside jokes, and nobody jockeying for position or trying to prove anything.
After dinner, Everett left for a party—with his girlfriend. And I was genuinely happy for him. He had a great night. I had a great day. Nobody lost. Nobody felt left out. Everyone’s cup was filled in their own way.
This kind of day doesn’t happen by accident. It’s taken us years of work, conversations, negotiation, and—most importantly—self-awareness. We don’t just “do polyamory”; we practice it. And for us, it’s not about maximizing pleasure or collecting partners. It’s about building a supportive, emotionally intelligent community of people who want to show up for one another.
Polyamory doesn’t mean I love my husband any less. It doesn’t mean there’s chaos or comparison or insecurity. It means I love people in different ways and allow them to love me in the ways that feel best to them. It means understanding that one person doesn’t have to be everything to you, and that’s okay.
For anyone out there saying, “Polyamory can’t possibly work,” I hear you. That was me, too, once.
But I’m living proof that it can. Because yesterday was a full, rich, beautiful day—and it wasn’t exceptional. It was just... life.
And life, when shared with intention, is incredibly sweet.
