When You Fall in Love with Someone New—and Don’t Have to Leave the One You’re With
TikTok video from 2022-02-15
What happens when someone in a relationship falls in love with someone else?
Traditionally, we’re taught there’s only one path—if I’m married and I fall in love with another person, the assumption is that I’ll leave my husband to be with this new person. That’s just the narrative we’re fed: one love must replace the other.
But polyamory gives me a different option.
It gives me freedom. I don’t have to choose. I get to experience the full joy and thrill of falling in love—while still holding on to the deep, lasting love I share with my husband.
With polyamory, I have options.
I get to feel that exciting rush of new relationship energy—the kind that makes your heart race, your stomach flutter, and your whole body light up.
You know that feeling.
We’ve all felt it, maybe back in high school, or early in a new romance.
It’s that beautiful, exhilarating sensation of experiencing someone new.
But instead of that meaning the end of something, it simply becomes an addition to my life. I don’t want to spend all my time with this new love. I still want to spend time with my husband. I still want to nurture my other relationships.
Falling in love doesn’t erase the love I already have - it expands it.
And yes, I know you’re thinking it: what about jealousy? Great question, and one I’ll definitely talk more about in another post. There’s a lot to unpack there, and I’m more than happy to share what I’ve learned about navigating those feelings.
But the heart of it is this: with polyamory, I get to honor the love that’s already in my life and welcome new love when it arrives. And to me, that’s a truly beautiful thing. I can live my life without denying myself connections with others, no matter how they present themselves.
Got questions about jealousy, falling in love, or anything else about polyamory? Drop them my way. I’m always happy to keep the conversation going.
