What’s a Rope Bunny? (And Why I Have One)
TikTok video from 2022-04-08
If you’ve been exploring kink or ethical non-monogamy, chances are you’ve come across the term rope bunny and wondered what exactly that means. I get this question often—especially since I started talking more about my rope experiences—so let me share both the definition and a personal story.
In the world of rope play, which falls under the broader kink and BDSM umbrella, a rope bunny is the person being tied. The person doing the tying is typically called the rigger or the top. Rope play can range from playful and decorative to deeply emotional, erotic, or even therapeutic. And yes—it’s always rooted in consent, trust, and communication.
Being a rope bunny doesn’t automatically mean someone is submissive (though they can be). It simply means they enjoy the experience of being bound—physically, mentally, or emotionally.
I met my rope bunny a few weeks ago at a Munch—a low-key social event in the kink community where people come together to chat, share stories, and connect in a safe, non-sexual setting. I highly recommend Munches to anyone starting out.
He and I hit it off. We’ve had a couple of casual, easygoing dates—nothing romantic, nothing sexual (yet), but a connection built on comfort and curiosity. He’s sweet, open, and very into the idea of rope. Specifically, being the one tied. He wants to feel that restraint, the tension, the beauty of surrendering control in a consensual, creative space. And I’m here for that.
Now let’s be honest—I don’t normally date younger men. And I’m not particularly interested in pursuing a romantic or sexual relationship with him. But rope play? That’s where we meet in the middle. That’s our shared language. And sometimes, that’s all a dynamic needs to be.
There’s this idea in our culture that every connection needs to lead to romance or sex to be meaningful. But that’s not true—especially not in the kink and poly communities. Sometimes, the relationship is the experience itself.
He’s my rope bunny. I’m his rigger. That doesn’t require candles and lingerie or long talks about commitment. It requires mutual respect, communication, and shared enthusiasm for the act of tying and being tied.
There’s something deeply meditative about rope for me. The rhythm of the knots. The feel of the rope in my hands. The energy exchange between top and bottom. It’s intimate—not necessarily sexual, but still intimate in a way that demands presence and honesty.
Before I go any further, I want to emphasize that rope play—like any form of BDSM—must be practiced safely. That means understanding risks (like nerve damage or circulation issues), learning proper technique, and having clear, enthusiastic consent. If you're just starting out, take a class, find a mentor, or go slow. Trust is everything.
I’m polyamorous. I’ve been married for 34 years. I have a boyfriend, several comet lovers, and now—I have a rope bunny. Each relationship serves a different need, a different version of connection. This one happens to be more physical and creative than romantic or sexual.
And it’s working beautifully.
We’re planning our third rope session this weekend. Maybe we’ll become close friends. Maybe we’ll just keep this dynamic as-is. Either way, it feels right—and right now, that’s enough.
So, what’s a rope bunny?
They’re someone who trusts you to tie them, to hold space with them, and to help them explore vulnerability, beauty, and pleasure in their own way. And if you’re lucky like me, you might just find one who makes the experience as fulfilling for you as it is for them.
